One Month

Dear Thomas,

One month ago, you came in to the world. It was an unceremonious arrival, yanked from the warmth of my belly in to this big wide world, but we were so glad to finally meet you. The last month has been the hardest, but simultaneously most rewarding of our lives. You’ve changed so much already, and I want to record it all, so I don’t forget.

You always were a wriggler, even when you were inside me, and that hasn’t changed since you were born. You’re surprisingly strong – able to hold your head up really well, and even try to move yourself from your daddy to me when you want milk. Which you do – a lot! You’re a hungry boy and seem to love your milk. You’ve grown so much in a month, so we must be doing something right. In the second half of your first month you developed the habit of spitting up your milk when you’d gulped in too fast. You can certainly be a messy boy, but at times you also have impeccable aim… straight down the inside of mummy’s top!

At least you save aiming your poo for daddy. I never knew that newborns can project their poo across the room. Your daddy didn’t either, until he was covered in it!

You have a very good set of lungs and like to show them off, especially at around half past midnight. But you make lots of other noises too. Lots of baby snuffles and grunts when you sleep and lots of little baby sneezes. You also get lots of hiccps, as you did before you were born. You look so sad as your little body jerks up and down with squeaky little pops. You’re a very noisy eater too. Besides the slurps and gulps and swallows, you sound like a squeaky wheel. The midwife, health visitor and breastfeeding counsellor have all laughed at your noisy feeds and if they don’t quieten down soon, we might have to oil you! Your final noisy offerings make your dad proud. You can fart for England and there is often no mistaking when you’ve just filled your nappy, from the tell tale eruption noises.

You love getting out and about mister. When we put you in the pram you often scream, but as soon as we get outside and get moving, you quieten right down. You’re too nosy to tolerate the hood of your pram being up though, and you’re much calmer if you can see the world going by. Of course, you’re still too small for your snowsuit – your feet don’t reach in to the legs – but we just zip you in to it like a giant, cosy sleeping bag and you look so snug. Mummy and Daddy are jealous. You also seem to like riding in the car, and you’ve even had your very first bus and train rides already.

You behave well in public too. We’ve taken you to Starbucks several times and you’re always as good as gold, either sleeping soundly, or looking around, quiet and contented. You even feed well in public – nice and quick and tidy. You save the mess and histrionics for at home! Likewise with your nappy changes, fortunately! In fact you seem to prefer having an audience. On your first big trip out to Bluewater at 8 days old you refused to feed in the private feeding room. But just 10 minutes later, when mummy had sat down to eat her lunch, you wanted some too! All this good behaviour in public leads to people thinking you’re an angel. I tell them appearances can be deceptive!

You’ve had your very first photo shoot too. I’m sure the resulting images will show that angelic side, but behind the scenes we had to work very hard to encourage you to co-operate. Sometimes the only thing that will calm you besides milk is sucking on our fingers, so we had to keep letting you suck, then leaping out of the way to capture the shot!

Luckily for us, you do seem to like your sleep. You nap happily in your moses basket during the day, and give us long stretches of sleep most nights. You do like to stay up late though and I’m not sure you’ve really worked out the difference between night and day. For the record, 2am is not an acceptable bed time!

You’re so much more alert already, and you’re beginning to lose your scrunched up newborn look as you stretch out in to all the space around you. You seem to have found your hands and like to grab tightly on to anything within reach, including mummy’s necklaces. But the way you hold my finger sometimes as you feed melts my heart. You’ve just discovered how to suck your own fingers, which were hoping means you won’t need to borrow our quite so often.

You’ve already changed so much in a month. But Mummy and Daddy have changed a lot too. We’re a bit calmer, and much, much more confidentnow than we were those tentative first few days. We still don’t really know what we’re doing, and frequently think we’re not doing very well, but I hope you’ll forgive us, baby boy, becuase we love you very, very much. You’re the biggest achievement of our lives. By far.

Lots of love from your Mummy


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